Someone Like You
by Polkadotdotdot
Summary: Kaidan had made it perfectly clear that she wasn't important to him anymore. This guy that was feeding her with drinks may not have been Kaidan but he was as close as she was going to get. Implied Shenko, ME2 oneshot.


-This little one shot of mine was inspired by the Adele song "Someone like you" I was listening to it and the idea just hit me and I knocked it up in a few minutes. Not my best I'll admit, I'm out of practice but I needed to get this out. A little bit of Shenko angst set after Kaidan and Shepard's meeting on Horizon-

* * *

The beat in the club pounded through her head, reverberating into her chest and mixing with the warming sensation that her fourth shot had provided as it slid down her throat. Two days shore leave she had given the crew, on Omega of all places. She knew that most of them wouldn't want to leave the ship for long periods of time, only heading out for a quick drink and dance before heading back. It wasn't the type of place Shepard would normally have wanted to linger.

Shepard had opted against the Citadel, not wanting to take the chance she would run into anyone that she would know. Tonight she was just herself, just Jess. She wasn't a commander, there was no suicide mission.

Most of all, she had not just had her heart broken by the only man she had ever loved.

From the first moments Shepard had opened her eyes, Kaidan had been in her thoughts. She was confused, sore as hell and frankly, scared. All she wanted was for him to be there, to grab her hand and tell her that everything was under control and she was fine. Shepard knew fine well that you can't always get what you wish for. Any attempt to try and find Kaidan had been stonewalled from both Anderson and the Illusive Man. She had been certain they had their own reasons, never the less, the sting was still fresh.

Then he was there, in front of her on Horizon. He looked…tired. He looked as if the past two years had aged him beyond his thirty four years and she couldn't help the pang of guilt that hit her in the gut knowing that she was more than likely the cause of it. She had noticed that had been the effect on many of her past crewmates.

She remembered how her heart fluttered in her chest when she finally heard his voice, like music ringing in her ears.

"You're in the presence of a legend…and a ghost," The way his voice had dropped was like ice in her chest. She had to remind herself to breathe. As he continued to speak the pains in her chest continued to grow until she had almost lost the ability to form a sentence, let alone give him any kind of logical argument. He called her a traitor, to both the alliance and to him then turned his back on her, walked away without a second glance backwards.

Even the heavy bass wasn't doing anything to dull the words replaying in her head.

She gestured to the bartended to pour her another two shots which she downed quickly, screwing her eyes at the harsh alcohol that was starting to flow through her system. She didn't mind, she had set out with the agenda of anonymity. No uniforms, just low slung jeans and a black vest. Hell, she wasn't even out with any of her crew. That suited her fine.

A few drinks later, even with her slightly hazy senses, she had felt someone slide up next to her, close enough that she could feel the heat radiating from their body. Slowly she moved her long hair behind her ear and took in their appearance from the corner of her eye. The sight almost made her drop the shot glass she had been holding.

The man had short, dark hair that sat slightly messy save for the neatly trimmed side burns. His jaw was covered in a layer of short stubble and he was gazing at her with dark eyes. Slowly, taking one more shot for courage, she turned to face the man. Shepard wasn't sure if it was disappointment or relief when she saw the imperfections on the man's face revealing that Kaidan had not somehow tracked her down to Afterlife on Omega.

"Hey, I've noticed you hanging out here," The man said, his voice not nearly as deep as Kaidan's, "Can I buy you a drink?"

Shepard paused, not sure if it was going to be a good idea to accept. With a small smile she nodded and the man ordered them both some kind of Batarian concoction that burned a small trail down her throat. She had no doubt it was the strongest thing behind that bar and for once, she wasn't worried about it.

She was vaguely aware that he was talking to her about what he did, some kind of merc that worked on behalf of Aria T'Loak on occasion. She just continued to smile and answered when the conversation called her too, he was doing enough talking for the both of them. Hell, he hadn't even asked her name. Not that she was going to give it.

She was inside her own head, flashes coming to her at a thousand miles a minute. Their night together before Ilos. How his lips felt against her skin, their bodies against one another as they worked together into a frenzy of desperation, love and pent up lust. It was then she had realised that she was well and truly in love with Kaidan Alenko. It made her sick to her stomach to think they had only had a few short, blissful months together before her life had been, literally, blasted away from her.

"Say, it's pretty loud in here, do you wanna go somewhere a bit quieter?" The man in front of her asked. Her mind clouded, Shepard allowed the doppelganger to take her hand and pull her from the club.

* * *

His lips were attacking her throat, nipping at the delicate skin near her ears, one arm wrapped around her waist undoing her belt, while the other was rubbing her through her underwear. He had her pressed up against the wall, his stomach against her back as his lips moved around to the back of her neck.

His hands moved past her underwear and found her core as the other arm worked on sliding her jeans and underwear down. She moaned, her legs unconsciously separating to allow him access. He plunged into her, forearms bracing against the wall in the darkened warehouse. There was nothing tender about the action, there was no love involved. She panted as he thrust into her, ignoring his own groans.

She knew it was wrong. It was low, so very low. What would he think of her if he discovered that this was what she was doing, is this what she had become? Drunken sex in an alley on Omega and with a stranger that looked like him no less. Suddenly Shepard was glad that she wasn't facing the man behind her. He grunted, completely focused on the task as she spasmed around him and he let out a shout as he came to his own end.

There was no tender kiss, no loving embrace or sweet whispers. As quickly as she could, Shepard sorted her clothing and without so much as a second look back rushed from the alley back to the Normandy, self-consciously trying to wipe the tears that had started to make tracks down her cheeks.

* * *

Shepard couldn't have been more thankful when she walked onto a practically empty ship. Nobody around to ask her questions as she made a direct line from the airlock to the elevator. She felt filthy, she felt cheap and worthless. She could feel bile in the back of her throat even thinking that she had basically gone out, drank herself stupid and had sex with a complete stranger. Hell, she might as well have taken money from him to top it all off.

"Commander, are you in need of assistance?" EDI's polite voice rang through her cabin as she stumbled in, a line of clothes leading from the door to the bathroom as she stripped off as quickly as she could. Shepard made a mental note to burn those clothes later.

"No and I want full confidence. You do not tell anyone on our crew of where I've been or what I've been doing!" Her voice sounded strange in her ears, thick and garbled with drink and tears.

The hot water pounded against her skin, the heat so high it almost scalded her but she didn't care. She would burn every inch of skin she allowed to be touched off if she could. The tension that had been building in her chest finally broken as her forehead leaned against the wall of the shower, her body being racked by harsh sobs. She could still hear him telling her how she had betrayed him, how she had left him. His disgusted face glared at her when she closed her eyes.

"Commander, you have received a new message," Slowly Shepard turned the water off, accepting that it was going to take more than just a shower to get rid of the invisible grime that sat on her skin. After drying off and putting on a plain white shirt and sweats, Shepard sat herself down at her terminal. Work would at least possibly help take her mind off what an awful night this had turned into.

Her breath caught in her throat when his name appeared on the screen. After everything that was said down on that damn colony, he was explaining himself, apologising. Not only that but he was hinting that he might want to see her again. The tension built in her chest once and she allowed the tears to flow freely once again, taking a small comfort that it was good for her to finally let go of everything she had been keeping bottled since she had been woken.


End file.
